Nigerians have long dominated traditional freelance categories like content writing, graphic design and virtual assistance. However, a new field that is built on human connection has emerged and waiting to be explored by Nigerian freelancers. Here’s everything you should know about empathetic listening.
What Is Empathetic Listening?
Before we explore this as a freelance opportunity, it’s essential to first understand what empathetic listening actually means. Empathetic listening goes far beyond simply hearing words. It’s the practice of being fully attentive and emotionally responsive to another person’s thoughts and feelings during conversation. It involves making an emotional connection with the other person and finding similarities between their experience and your own so you can give a more heartfelt response.
Empathetic listening can be thought of as creating a safe emotional space where someone can express themselves without fear of judgment, interruption, or unsolicited advice. The empathic listener’s job is to get inside the other person’s perspective and see the world the way they do. This requires using not just your ears, but your full attention, emotional intelligence and genuine compassion.
Distinguished psychologist Carl Rogers described this practice as a complex process of “entering the private perceptual world of the other and becoming thoroughly at home in it.” It involves moment-to-moment sensitivity of the speaker’s feelings and temporarily living within the life of the other without judgment.
The Difference Between Hearing and Truly Listening
Many of us believe we’re good listeners, but the research tells a different story. A now world-famous 1984 study by physician Howard Beckman found that 70% of patients were interrupted within 20 seconds when speaking to doctors, and just 2% got to finish their thought. This pattern isn’t limited to medical settings, it pervades our workplaces, homes, and increasingly, our digital interactions.
In our fast-paced world where our attention spans are increasingly narrowed, genuine listening has become a rare commodity. For the most part, we’re often planning our response while others are still speaking, checking our phones during conversations, or offering quick-fix advice when someone simply needs to be heard. This scarcity has created an unexpected market opportunity.
What Does Empathetic Listening Involve?
On platforms like Freelancer, Upwork and Fiverr, empathetic listening sessions are typically offered as timed services that usually lasts from 30 minutes to an hour. This job posting example on Zip Recruiter, shows a client willing to pay $60 for a 30-minute session focused on personal life challenges and emotional release.
During these sessions, the empathetic listener provides:
A judgment-free zone: Clients can express their thoughts, fears, frustrations or anxieties without criticism or unsolicited advice.
Active presence: Being present means more than just being physically in the same space with the speaker. It entails being focused closely on the conversation, minimizing distractions and refraining from planning responses while the other person is talking.
Emotional validation: Validating the emotions of the speaker demands the listener’s full attention and observation and acknowledging their feelings. Most importantly, it involves letting them know their experiences matter.
Confidential space: Everything shared during the session remains private, creating the trust necessary for genuine emotional release.
Skills That this Gig Requires for Success
While empathetic listening might seem straightforward, it demands specific qualities and competencies. Most of them are covered in this piece by psychologist, Jamil Zaki, for Harvard Business Review. Here are the main takes.
Core Qualities
Compassion and Non-Judgment: The main component to being an empathic listener is identifying with the other person’s emotional experience. You must refrain from criticizing the speaker, either aloud or internally, even when you disagree with their perspective.
Patience: It may take the speaker some time to find the words for what they want to say and feel comfortable enough to express them. Avoid rushing or showing impatience as this would undermine the entire purpose of the session.
Trustworthiness: Clients must feel confident that their vulnerabilities won’t be shared or exploited.
Emotional Intelligence: You need to recognize and understand emotions, both your own and those of your clients, without becoming overwhelmed by them.
Practical Skills
Active Listening Techniques: This includes maintaining appropriate eye contact (even in video calls), using affirming body language and providing subtle acknowledgments like “I hear you” or “That sounds difficult.”
“Looping”: This perspective-getting technique involves asking a question, giving the other person time to answer, then paraphrasing what you’ve heard and following up with phrases like “Is that right?” or “What else am I missing?”
Emotional Regulation: You must manage your own emotional responses to maintain a calm, supportive presence regardless of what’s being shared.
Cultural Sensitivity: You should be able to understand diverse perspectives and experiences without imposing your own cultural assumptions or values.
Learn More From Positive Psychology: How To Improve Your Empathetic Listening Skills: 7 Techniques
Who Is Best Suited for This Gig?
For Nigerians, this opportunity is particularly relevant for several reasons. Our culture traditionally values community support and interpersonal connection, both values that align perfectly with empathetic listening. Additionally, Nigeria’s strong presence in the global freelance market positions us well to tap into this growing demand.
However, this freelance opportunity isn’t for everyone. The most successful empathetic listeners typically share certain characteristics:
1. People with counselling or psychology backgrounds: While formal qualifications aren’t always required, training in these fields provides valuable frameworks for understanding human emotion and communication.
2. Individuals with high emotional maturity: Rogers believed this way of being is not for everyone. The empathic person must know themselves well enough. They must also be solidly grounded enough in their own world to avoid getting lost in the other person’s strange or bizarre world.
3. Those who naturally draw others to confide in them: If friends, family and colleagues frequently seek you out for emotional support, then you likely have innate listening abilities worth monetizing.
4. People with personal experience overcoming challenges: Your own journey through difficulties can deepen your capacity for empathy, though you must avoid making sessions about your experiences.
Professionals in caring fields: Nurses, teachers, social workers, and similar professionals often possess the empathy and patience required.
Getting Started
If this opportunity resonates with you, consider these initial steps:
- Develop your skills: Read books on empathetic listening, practice with willing friends or family and consider taking online courses in active listening or basic counseling techniques.
- Create a professional profile: On freelance platforms, clearly articulate your approach, experience, and the safe space you’ll provide. Testimonials from practice sessions can build credibility.
- Set appropriate boundaries: Understand that you’re providing listening services, not therapy. Know when situations require professional mental health intervention.
- Start modestly: Begin with lower rates as you build experience and reviews and gradually increase your fees as demand grows.
- Practice self-care: Regularly processing the emotional weight of this work through your own support systems is essential for sustainability.
